It’s Time to Care…

The CEO of our hospital gave this speech earlier this week.

It was heartwarming & inspiring. He talked about having faith in ourselves and that IT’S TIME TO CARE.

He ended his speech with a quote:

It’s time to care;

It’s time to take responsibility;

It’s time to lead;

it’s time for a change;

it’s time to be true to our greatest self;

It’s time to stop blaming others.

Kinda thought he was speaking to me… just me.

But I wasn’t the only one who thought that.

Little did I know, my co-worker (and now one of my good friends) was planning to leave the hospital. She said that she had been thinking about it for months. That she wanted to pursue a career in her own field which was IT.

“I prayed to Allah,” she said. “I asked him that if this is the path I should take that he guide me into it. If this is not the right decision, please take it away,” she said. She was the kind of person who believes in signs.

Our CEO’s speech was that sign. “It’s time to be true to our greatest self.”

IT companies & offices called her & asked if they could interview her. Needless to say she was thrilled. I told her that even though I would like her to stay, that I would like it even more if she followed her true passion. That she had more to lose if she didn’t.

“Ahhh… I remember when I was in the exact same situation you’re in now,” I told her..

She said to me, “No, it’s different. You are still very young. This is just a first step for you. You have a lot of chances, I’m sure. As for me…” she didn’t end her sentence, but I knew what she meant.

I just patted her plump shoulder and said “You’ll be fine. That’s what you told me before and I have faith that you’ll be just fine.”

She smiled at me and said, “Pray for me, okay?”

And I will.

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Letters to Morla (5): Thankful

You’re right. We shouldn’t forget the little things.

Which for today are:

1. I got to go home on time (though at the expense of my boss’ aching back)

2. Dad’s cooking Halabos (Sauteed shrimp)

3. Aladdin’s texts

4. Letters from you and Donna

5. I get to sleep in an air-conditioned room in a comfy bed.

I guess I’m more blessed than I thought.

Letter to an Old friend: Over thinking

I feel… kinda lost.

They say I’m still young… I’ll get over it. That the world is my oyster. That I’m over thinking things… over thinking. I hate that word. It reminds me of you.

I always admired how you always seize the day (even though you wake up past noon almost everyday) and do what you love. I admire your tenacity & sense of self-fulfillment. I like that you don’t over think. You ask yourself “What do I want to do today?” and you just go do it. No holding back. No over thinking anything. Do you actually think of anything… at all?

Well, whatever you’re doing, it works. You’re in a good place in your life where you’re (almost) your own boss. You LIKE going to work. Can’t argue with that… I would kill for your job. And yes I know, I had the chance. I’ll let that fact fester in my gut for a while. You wanted to help me… you wanted to show me I could do it. But I disappointed you. I over think everything. And now I regret not taking that chance.

But… I can’t afford not to over think, man. I have… obligations… responsibilities that were handed to me before I reached college. My old man is going to retire in a few years and I’ll be the one who is responsible for my family. I’m going to need something a bit more stable to hold on to… at least for now. My dream can wait… it has no choice but to wait.

I wronged you and caused you to hate me. The years we invested on our friendship disappeared along with your respect for me. A little overzealous on the hate but, that’s who you are. When someone has ruined your trust, there’s not a chance in hell that person (ergo, me) can get it back. Unless a miracle happens, I suppose. Luckily, I believe in miracles.

I guess I’m just being optimistic or trying to be. I just don’t know if it’s worth it. Even though we are not “cool” anymore, just know that you have my respect, admiration, & support. You have done what most of us are scared to do… follow your dreams. Look where it got you now. Someday, I’ll get there too, and I hope that you’ll see me in a different light, not as a “coward” who wronged you, but as someone who also followed their dream (and at the same time as someone who wronged you).

Besides, taking care of my family is part of my dream. I wish you could see how hard I’m working for both myself and family. I didn’t quit on myself, man. Just prioritizing. Family comes first. I can’t afford the luxury of prioritizing my dream, like you do.

Going over this blog, I can see how much I over think. He he. You were right. But like I said, I can’t afford not to. I’ll get there someday… I’ll earn your respect again.

Letters to Donna (1): Couldn’t I have been a pretty hairy mole?

Dear Donna,

At last! You finally found the time to start a, yet another, blog.

Reading your letter, I got to the part where you absentmindedly walked in the direction of my old apartment. Kinda bummed me out & touched me at the same time. I can relate though. The first few times I got out from work, I had sudden urges to text you you & Darlyn to come by my place and have a drink. Then I’ll remember that you’re thousands of miles away and I just stare at a screen with a recipient but no message.

But, we’ll get by. Just think of the celebration we’re gonna have once we get together again. Oh the drunken chaos we’ll bring! Though I won’t be smoking anymore, coz we’ll be vaaaaaapiiiiiing!

How’s law school, btw? Based on your “cheery” description of it, you seem to be having fun. Hehe. Don’t worry, you’ll do great. I have faith that you will be that “Big Shot Lawyer” you keep telling me about. “Ye Old Pub” is gonna need you for it’s legal department. I wrote to Darlyn about pursuing the idea of having a business together. Hope she agrees. 500 a month can go a long way.

Anyways… I miss you guys so much. Now that you have a blog again, I’ll look forward to your letters.

Your hairy little mole,

Tinay

Letters to Morla (4) : Hand of God & Bunch of other stuff

Sweet zombie Cheesus. Hand of God?!

Oh Rico… *sigh*

Maybe I can take a smidge of credit… but no hand of God stuff there. Maybe it was just really meant to be. Serendipity? (I love that movie)

Whatever it was, I’m glad it happened. Seems like you and me Granson are doing great! I read one of you blogs where he tried to hold your hand while you were eating a hamburger and you said no because it was greasy. Yet, he held it anyway. I was like “Awwww.” Good thing I was alone in the office or else my boss would’ve caught me “surfin’ on the job.”

You & Rico just keep doin what you do, & you’ll be fine. Stay honest, try to do different stuff when you see each other so you won’t get in a rut. I really like that “Five for Five” you two are doing. Kinda wish Aladdin liked to read. Then again, he kinda wished I liked to play ball (oh but I do… *sexual innuendo right there* ).

Speaking of sexual innuendos, has the cherry been err… popped yet? Sorry, couldn’t resist.

Regarding that bit about me “building walls”, yeah, that’s still happening. Though it’s a little better now. Guess I was just being uber emotional. And yes, I really do want to go home to Iloilo. Mostly because you & Donna are there (ultra gaaaaaay!). But I understand why you want to get out of there. Just a change of scenery, perhaps? Who knows, you might get that chance. The three of us could do it together when Donna is (as she would put it) “a big shot lawyer.”

By the way, Donna & I have been thinking about our plan to do business together. That maybe we could start saving up for capital. Just pitch in every month bit by bit. Even if it’s just 500 or 200 pesos a month, it’s fine. I don’t mind starting end of October. Are you up for it? Think about it, our own bar “Ye Old Pub” (emphasis on the “Pub” part). Think it over, okay? Then you & Donna open the account and just send me the details.

Before we know it, we’ll have enough to… buy a sign maybe. Hehe. It’s a win-win, if we don’t pursue it, the money will just go back to us as savings, if it’ll go through, then we’re halfway to our dream of becoming our own bosses. *Sigh*

About the books, I still have a lot of books from you that I haven’t read yet. They just keep piling up (and I kinda like it. Hehe). On my next trip to Jarir Bookstore, I’ll pick up a copy of Persuasion and that other book you mentioned, The Diviners? Don’t worry, I’ll look it up.

Let’s discuss the Darcy vs Wentworth on our next letter, shall we?

Till next time, friend.

Letters to Morla (3): Feeling so Wonderfully Gay

Dear Morla,

First of all, I had some free time, so here you go:

ImageSecondly, your letter (though not as gay as mine was) means a lot to me. I hate that we’re apart. Though I try to “blend” in here (it’s as if I didn’t grow up here), I still find myself longing for my life there in Iloilo.

Yes, I remember that day you got your braces removed and begged you to come with me to Sabee’s for moral support (it was “St. Patrick’s” day). Aren’t you glad I dragged you there? Haha! Ever since you & Rico hit it off, both of you kept thanking me. Why? I wasn’t playing Cupid, you two don’t owe me. Somehow, the fates conspired for you two to meet (how gay do I sound right now?). I’m just glad be a part of how you two met.

Please convince Donna to use her WordPress once in a while so that we can do this “Letter” thing with her. Hehe. I really miss you guys.

Looking forward to your next letter,

Tinay